In a season of change (possibly a very tough season), your friend needs you. She may need you to sit with her, to maybe even cry with her. She may not ask for it. She may not even know she needs it. But it will be balm to her.
Your friend doesn’t need you to discount her need to accept the change – that letting go. Don’t say, “Oh, well … that’s in the past.” Or don’t say, “Here today, gone tomorrow!” No. She needs time to sit and soak and grieve and cry and say good-bye to what was. The former things are sometimes hard to let go of … and it takes time.
If her marriage is disintegrating, or a job or something that was a huge part of her life, she needs time to find her new identity. Her new purpose. Her new self even (or so it feels like). Yes, your friend needs you to sit with her and BE with her. Maybe even cry together as a way of saying you understand – without words.
It’s extremely special when you can go to someone who is experiencing a season you’ve been through. A road you’ve traveled. And you truly understand. As you sit with her, you don’t have to say a word. Except you may have words of comfort. Your words will be more meaningful to her. With your experience, you may have words that others lack.
Because you know. You’ve been in her shoes. And you know she will, in time, be OK. She just can’t see it yet. Nor does she want to hear it yet. She just needs to stew and sob and soak in her sadness for a little while.
And then, in due time, when she is ready, she will go on. In the meantime, she needs your words of encouragement. Not flippant words of “get over it”. But words of affirmation of who she is to God. God’s love for her. His purpose for her. His leading into a new season for her. His plan. His new thing for her.
In time, she will be ready to move on. You cannot rush it. No one can. And she will find herself again. If she will seek the Lord, He will lead her to the new thing He has for her. Himself anew and refreshed in her. When she finds deeper levels of relationship with the Lord, she will find deeper levels of herself there with Him.
Because He lives~